Zima is Making a Comeback

Zomething that no one was asking for.

In case you’re too young (or too old, I guess) to remember getting drunk in the 90’s, Zima is a clear malt beverage that was the trendy alcoholic drink of choice for ditzy sorority girls everywhere.  A few men may have drank it as well, but it was usually in secret or strictly out of necessity because there was simply no other alcohol available.

Marketed as “Zomething Different”, Zima’s popularity waned in the 2000’s and U.S. distribution was stopped in 2008, although it is still available in Japan.

Well, apparently it’s making a comeback.

A MillerCoors spokesman told Ad Age that “more news [is] coming soon” and that “if you’re one of the zillion fans who have missed Zima, the answer should be clear.”

Um… “zillion”?  Zeriously?!

MillerCoors execs seem to think the brand died due to poor marketing.  Anyone who has ever tried it knows that it just a poor product.  It was a trend.  That’s all.  We were already obsessed with clear soda, so clear “near beer” was only logical.   But then we realized… we were just out of our freaking minds.

If you haven’t tried Zima before, then go ahead and give it a shot.  Just don’t say I didn’t warn you. You might as well just mix rail gin, diet Sprite, and two packets of Sweet ‘n Low… it’s basically the same taste.